Relief Society Retreat, broken bones, and 10 months

We've been having quite the adventures here at the Reichman household. I was fortunate enough to go on a stake RS retreat to beautiful Heber last weekend, which was a blast! I was hesitant to go, since I didn't know anyone in our ward yet and feared ending up in a group of people I couldn't relate to, but l ended up having the time of my life. Turns out there are a lot of sisters in my ward who are young moms like me (and 5 of the 16 or so who came were pregnant!! Good thing it's not contagious!! Ha!!) We stayed in some cabins, ate lots of yummy food and hot chocolate, heard some inspiring talks, saw lots of deer, did a humanitarian project, did a freaking scary "challenge" course, and went on a lovely hike. It was a much needed break for me, and also the first time I had spent a night away from Caleb. I wasn't nervous, because thankfully I totally trust Brent.

Perhaps I shouldn't have been quite so trusting, though, because the moment I had reception, the texts started coming.

Saturday morning, Brent was playing ultimate frisbee. He laid out to catch the frisbee, when another opposing player landed right on top of his hand. When he got up, Brent's fingers were crossed, and he thought, "I didn't do that...." Luckily, Brent's brothers were there, and one went with him to help with Caleb so Brent could go to the Health Center. Thankfully, Caleb was an angel baby. The Health Center confirmed what he thought--his ring finger was very much broken. It was a bad enough break that he needed surgery. Boo.

Luckily Brent has such supportive brothers, because they stayed with him until I got home and could take care of him. His hand was in a splint, and the x-rays showed Spock-like hands. Needless to say, we couldn't make it to the Ogden Temple dedication the next day, as no babies were allowed, and I couldn't leave Caleb with Brent alone. (Was it good??)

Also lucky for us, Brent was able to get an appointment fairly quickly for his surgery (after correcting some failed communication). The surgery went as well as it possibly could have, and now Brent has two long pins in his finger that remind one of Wolverine. Caleb and I hung out at a park that was conveniently next to the clinic, and the surgery went quickly. Brent waking up from anesthesia wasn't quite as hilarious as we were hoping it would be. Basically, Brent reminded me of a very sweet little boy waking up from a really good dream. A little dazed, with a smile on his face. :) Brent was very pampered that day with Wendy's chicken nuggets, homemade chocolate chip cookies, and Batman Begins. I rewarded myself after Caleb went to bed with a very long bath and date with the Three Musketeers.

 But anyway, the pins will be removed in a couple weeks, and until then, Brent has quite the cast on his arm. Luckily PhD students never need to type (hardee har har). Brent has been getting to know the dictation feature on his laptop quite well. Who knew there would be all this trouble for one finger???

But all is well. Today itself has been interesting day of flip-flopping.

• Caleb woke up before seven, which in my opinion, no one should ever do. I am so not a morning person.
• Then I found out that DoTerra, who I have a lot of issues with, was under fire from the FDA. (I don't have issues with their product, just the company, for a lot of reasons that I won't list here.) Happy day! 
• Drove Brent to school, during which the car in front of us appeared to be intoxicated or on drugs (second time this month, what the heck Provo?)
• Got home, and Caleb took a blessed two and half hour nap, during which I was able to rest and get some housework done.
• Desperately needed the bathroom and found that the toilet was clogged! Nooooooo...
• Toilet unclogged.
• After Caleb woke up and ate lunch, I decided to go on a run because I really want to try to get in better shape, only to find that all three wheels on my Bob were flat. :(
• Reverted to Plan B, which meant taking our other cheap-o stroller to go on a pleasant walk.
• tried to FaceTime Grandma R, which failed. Which is just as well, because Caleb was starting to have some serious meltdowns. 

We will see how the rest of the day goes. 

Today is also Caleb's ten-month birthday, so I will quickly update any interested parties (aka my mother-in-law) ;)

Caleb LOVES solid, non-mashed foods, and will eat just about anything we put in front of him. We are transitioning from baby food into grown-up food as much as we are able to without him having any teeth. He has also began attempting to stand on his own! Yikes!! We are pretty sure this kid will be walking by his birthday. He loves exploring, eating, pulling out baby wipes and attempting to eat them, going outside, knocking down block towers we build, crawling around on our bed (under close supervision, of course), playing with the blinds, talking (a lot of gagaga, mamama, dadadada, and wowowowow). We recently introduced him to baby cheese puffs, which he is crazy for. Also, despite us not having stairs, he has learned to climb them at an impressive rate. He loves to be with other kids, to chase and be chased, and shaking rattle-like objects. He loves playing peek-a-boo with Brent underneath blankets. Something funny he likes to do is push the stroller back and forth. He is so sweet and good-natured.

Surprisingly, Caleb does not seem to enjoy patty-cake. Not surprisingly, he does not enjoy going to bed, being put in his car seat, being held for longer than a minute, or having objects rudely removed from his mouth by his discourteous parents. He also hates gettin dressed or undressed, as well as getting his diaper changed. In fact, he seems to have a personal goal to crawl away as fast as possible whenever his is buck naked.

                                         Caleb learning how to clap. We're getting there!

Why Visiting Teaching is Important to Me

In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, women over the age of eighteen are given a companion, and the two of them are typically assigned at least two other women in their church group (aka ward) to visit. They often share a spiritual message, and assess any needs. This is called visiting teaching.

I have talked to some people, and they have commented how they just haven't caught the "vision" of visiting teaching. I understand. Sometimes, it can be really awkward, especially visiting someone you don't know for the first time. Visits can be stiff. Sometimes people don't seem to want you there. Sometimes you'd rather be doing anything else. Or sometimes your assigned companion is, well, weird. Or sometimes you're companion is impossible to get a hold of. Or the girls you visit teach are impossible to get a hold of. Goodness knows I have had all of these scenarios happen to me.

But yet we are drilled many a Sunday lesson that visiting teaching is important. Stories are often shared of that "Sister Diligent" who faithfully visited a sister for years even though she never let her in the door and then one day she decided to come back to church after years of inactivity all because of Sister Diligent. Or the story of how Sister In-Tune-With-the-Spirit just knew she needed to drop by a sister's home but she didn't know why and upon answering the door the sister bursts into tears crying, "How did you know??" Or insert another life changing scenario here.

I'll be honest, I have never had those scenarios happen to me. In fact, I have never had one visiting teacher that I feel like saved my spiritual life because of one single crazy spiritual instance, and I'm pretty positive I haven't been that visiting teacher for anyone else. I am not trying to discount those stories--they are amazing, and important. But I don't think that they are the only thing that visiting teaching is about.

Here's what I think visiting teaching is about: I have always viewed visiting teaching as a way for us to be an extension of Christ's hands--to go in and visit and serve others, since Christ cannot come here and visit every person Himself. When we are given an assignment to visit a sister or two (or four, which has happened to my companion and me), Christ is essentially asking, "Please visit these sisters. They are important to Me. They have needs that you might be able to help with. You are going there instead of Me. I am counting on you to do this, and I know you can. Don't do it because you love them--do it because you love Me, and I will help you love them." 

For me, Visiting Teaching isn't about the share-over-the-pulpit life-changing stories. It is about friendship. It is about Sisterhood. It is my visiting teachers bringing a meal or two over when I've had a baby. Or bringing a meal the day before I move since all my dishes are packed. It's watching my baby so that I can have an hour of undistracted packing time. Or it's when I tell her I've been struggling with depression and she sits by me, puts her arm around my shoulder and says, "I've struggled with that too. I understand. If you ever need to talk, I am here." It's gratefully eating a treat they brought, because it was the only thing that sounded appetizing when I had such awful morning sickness. It's feeling like I have a friend to sit next to at church. It's my Latina visiting teachers helping me brush up on my rusty Spanish skills without me feeling embarrassed. It's the reassuring feeling that if something bad were to happen, I could call one of my visiting teachers to help, because they've been coming consistently, and so I feel like they care. All of those scenarios have happened to me. And I am so grateful, because all of those acts of unselfish service have helped me feel so loved. 

From the visiting teacher point of view, it was making cookies with a Panamanian sister I visited, who had always wanted to learn how. It's praying hard for her when she is scared of her upcoming medical procedure. It's bringing soup over to a sister that is sick. Or taking pictures of her newborn as a gift (or sharing another talent you have.) It's giving a ride to a sister who doesn't have a car. It's helping my companion who is learning English read a few verses of scripture she wants to share to the girls we are visiting. It's giving my companion a ride during an emergency, because she can't get a hold of her own visiting teachers. It's getting to know my companion who I thought was a complete nut, and learning how inspiring she is. It is that same crazy companion coming over and teaching me how to use my sewing machine. I am also grateful for these experiences, because I have learned so much from them. I have made friendships that were full of so much joy because of them. I have been able to feel like I am building God's kingdom, even if it's through just some "small and simple things." (Alma 37:6). These experiences have helped me to be less selfish, more serving, and more like Christ. They have helped me see others a little more how my Heavenly Father sees them. They have turned cynicism into humility, and those stiff, awkward appointments into friendlier ones. They have helped me get out of my comfort zone and into a growing zone.

From the Relief Society President point of view (which I did for a year in a single's ward), it's gratefully knowing that the sisters are taking care of each other. It's a relief off of your shoulders when visiting teachers meet needs of sisters, so that you can focus on other important matters. It's learning from visiting teachers of specific needs that you or the Bishop can help with that you would not have learned of any other way. It's having that certain feeling that this certain sister is supposed to visit this one, or be this one's companion, although you may never find out why. It is watching the sisters literally bless each other, and rejoicing in the bonds of friendship and sisterhood.

This, to me, is Visiting Teaching. And now I invite you to call or text your assigned sisters and set up a visit with them. Do it for them. Or for you. Or if for no other reason than trusting that this program is inspired, and that Heavenly Father has asked you. But please do it with an open mind and an open heart. If you do, I doubt you will regret it.